As I navigated the aisles of Walmart with a screaming toddler tucked under my right arm, while pushing the cart with the left, and a very opinionated 5 year old eagerly directing me, I cringed as I passed each and every by-stander. There was staring, some pretending not to stare and the few who offered to help. And every single offer that I had was from a mom, a mom who "remembers those days", or "has been there before". And just as I am sure they declined the offer, I too declined with a simple "thank you, but I'm ok".
I wasn't ok.
Sure I was okay in that moment, in the sense that I wasn't crouched down crying. I wasn't broken yet, but I absolutely felt close to my breaking point.
A rainy morning, a dirty car that the kids didn't empty that they said they emptied. A garbage scattered yard because my 9 year old was told to bring out the recycables and he did but simply threw them in a pile. A morning conversation that I play favorites and that my step children were far from my favorites. A good morning spill of coffee all over my car, with crumbs of rolls and bagels tossed around so elegantly because "mom allowed us to eat in the car", a screaming baby because she's 15 months old and she simply can. It was just "one of those days". And I could have used the help, someone to push the cart while my 15 month tried to break free from my mom grip. Someone to help me pick the baby shoe up off of the floor for the tenth time in a 2 minute span because today just wasn't the day for these shoes, or someone to help wipe up my spilled sanity I mean coffee off of the cereal aisle floor. I would have loved the help, but I'm mom, I got this.
We've been here, or close to it. But when your day is a rainy day it's hard to see past it, without the noise of the windshield wiper reminding you that it's a sucky rainy day. You're going to get through that rainy day. Just as I did, but when it's pouring and you just can't see past the rain, take the help. Say yes for once. For the creation of umbrellas were for a reason. Let that kind offer be your umbrella and give you brief shelter from the rain.
Sara, Mommsie Knows Best